ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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