I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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