best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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