The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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