Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(859): View more from Kentucky

I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.

(1-859): View more from Kentucky

Thanks for throwing up on me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(859): I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night. (1-859): Thanks for throwing up on me. http://tfl.nu/msvj

Replies (3) Good night (519) Bad night (1090)
Favorite
(908): View more from New Jersey

But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(908): But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes http://tfl.nu/c86w

Replies (24) Good night (3301) Bad night (609)
Favorite
(979): View more from Texas

so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(979): so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together. http://tfl.nu/dxc5

Replies (15) Good night (3901) Bad night (989)
Favorite
(954): View more from Florida

I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.

(727): View more from Florida

More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(954): I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning. (727): More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort. http://tfl.nu/lvyr

Replies (15) Good night (4684) Bad night (585)
Favorite
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(717): some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on http://tfl.nu/6iv3

Replies (24) Good night (7524) Bad night (814)
Favorite
(508): View more from Massachusetts

He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(508): He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water http://tfl.nu/2dzm

Replies (11) Good night (2380) Bad night (3160)
Favorite
(585): View more from New York

I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(585): I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet. http://tfl.nu/fy09

Replies (16) Good night (6342) Bad night (1153)
Favorite
(803): View more from South Carolina

I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(803): I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix http://tfl.nu/tcv4

Replies (35) Good night (7404) Bad night (1143)
Favorite
(402): View more from Nebraska

The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(402): The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again. http://tfl.nu/sd6x

Replies (11) Good night (1486) Bad night (3542)
Favorite
(405): View more from Oklahoma

in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(405): in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter. http://tfl.nu/55jx

Replies (4) Good night (2982) Bad night (946)
Favorite
(305): View more from Florida

so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(305): so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/ez3t

Replies (24) Good night (4051) Bad night (1219)
Favorite
(719): View more from Colorado

I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(719): I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me http://tfl.nu/in6y

Replies (3) Good night (1972) Bad night (820)
Favorite
(225): View more from Louisiana

all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(225): all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices. http://tfl.nu/vgow

Replies (31) Good night (7374) Bad night (1170)
Favorite
(410): View more from Maryland

She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(410): She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success! http://tfl.nu/k1zi

Replies (10) Good night (1690) Bad night (487)
Favorite
(865): View more from Tennessee

I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(865): I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night. http://tfl.nu/z7o8

Replies (8) Good night (1000) Bad night (311)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: