Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): There is a man walking 2 goats through the city. (614): Bonus: only one of them was on a leash. http://tfl.nu/ht0h
  Replies (27) Good night (3464) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch http://tfl.nu/nq1q
  Replies (12) Good night (3082) Bad night (1063)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion http://tfl.nu/iqkp
  Replies (3) Good night (911) Bad night (3143)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though http://tfl.nu/889i
  Replies (9) Good night (1008) Bad night (2425)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (951): It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle. http://tfl.nu/s5be
  Replies (15) Good night (977) Bad night (3678)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk http://tfl.nu/vf88
  Replies (2) Good night (1881) Bad night (1191)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  "too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): "too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence http://tfl.nu/grgx
  Replies (14) Good night (2574) Bad night (594)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes. http://tfl.nu/2pgh
  Replies (13) Good night (3401) Bad night (534)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday http://tfl.nu/d2se
  Replies (10) Good night (587) Bad night (1531)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday. http://tfl.nu/b5pa
  Replies (3) Good night (518) Bad night (1552)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space? http://tfl.nu/h1sf
  Replies (12) Good night (1260) Bad night (659)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I stand by it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her" (815): I stand by it. http://tfl.nu/atfq
  Replies (5) Good night (1661) Bad night (409)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside http://tfl.nu/wdly
  Replies (3) Good night (598) Bad night (206)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was http://tfl.nu/vhsw
  Replies (6) Good night (777) Bad night (214)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet... http://tfl.nu/1uxq
  Replies (2) Good night (293) Bad night (789)

Randomize