What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
