it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
