I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
