he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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