no you cant smoke seaweed
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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