Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
