Non-Jews are for practice
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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