you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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