Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
