I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
