its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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