This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize