Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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