Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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