you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it