Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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