thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
