my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
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Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
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I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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