What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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