Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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