It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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