and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
