just come out here and I will go home with you...
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
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