I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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