I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
