1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
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