The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize