the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
