the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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