I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
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I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
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Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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