i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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