I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize