i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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