I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize