God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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