he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
