hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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