She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
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