he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
