try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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