whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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