I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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