I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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