God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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