Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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